How to control your anger?

Aggression is a psychical or verbal action. It is usually intended action which can cause some kind of harm (for example pain or loss) to another person or a specific group of people (for example discrimination or racism). Aggression is also defined as an emotional state of the individual (behaviour) or its permanent features of personality (tendency to use violence). According to the researches, aggression developed as a tool for exerting an influence and solving problems or conflicts. What’s more, it enables strong people to enforce particular behaviour on weaker individuals. During the civilization development aggressive actions were not socially accepted any more.

What causes aggressive behaviour?

There is no general agreement whether aggression is innate or acquired. However, there are several concepts about the genesis of this state. Firstly, we can meet with the theory of social learning which means that people learn aggressive behaviour through observation or their own experience. Secondly, theory of instincts. Men behave aggressively, because it comes from his nature – he is born with the „instinct of struggle” that is necessary to him in order to survive. Thirdly, we can come across with the theory of frustration. Its source comes from the failure, frustration and jealousy.

Types of aggression

Researchers distinguish many types of aggression. The most popular among young people is:


physical aggression – It appears through the direct action against another individuals or objects. It takes the form of beating, pushing or destroying.
verbal aggression – It is manifested by threats or mockery and it can be revealed by persecution or injuring.
passive aggression – It is focused on emotional coldness and withdrawal from the relationship.
internal aggressive – It is manifested by self-injuries or suicide attempts.
external aggressive – It is directed against other people or objects and can take the form of beating, insulting or destroying

How to deal with aggression?

It is known that aggressive behaviour is not socially acceptable, however, most people face aggression in their daily lives. Feeling angry or violence is a natural and healthy phenomenon. It is just the body’s reaction to a conflict or problem. It is worth saying that people should not suppress negative emotions, but show them so as not to cause any harmful situations. Aggression can be relieved by screaming or violence. Firstly, you have to know your own feelings and emotions. Verbalising them is not the only effective method of reducing this tension, but also a way to achieve the desired goals. Secondly, you can free yourself from anger or stress through physical activities. Playing sports, walking with a dog or cleaning your flat not only reduce emotional tension, but also allow you to distance yourself from the situation that caused this stress.

Distinguishing violence from aggression is really important because what you are dealing with depends on possible further actions. If, for example, someone shows violence to someone, the victim’s strength is smaller than the offender. So then, the necessity to choose such defence activities that will protect the victim’s safety and health. In most cases this requires external intervention. In the situation of violence, escape is one of the most wise defence strategies. However, it is worth remembering that after finding a safe place, we should take up some actions to stop violence in the future. When to sides of conflict evince equal and aggressive behaviour, we can talk about a conflict situation. Everyone, who is involved, has a chance to win and achieve someone’s interests. To sum up, you firstly must analyse the situation and then choose a strategy to take actions that are beneficial for you.

The victims of violence have no particular choice – even if they fight, they will always lose.
You should always devote a lot of attention to safety and strive to avoid further violence. It is necessary to defend against repeated violence, because each following act of violence has a negative impact on the victim’s mental and physical health.

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